25 years ago today

There are certain events in history that turn out to be those "where were you when" times. They are the events so momentous that you can almost feel the world shifting on its axis.

For example, I always remember my mother telling me she could remember exactly where she was when she heard that JFK had been killed, or when Neil Armstrong first stepped on the moon.

I was always slightly jealous about this collective memory of the older generation- an instant talking point that bound people of a certain age together.

In my lifetime, those two events of life-changing proportion happened on a sunny September in 2001, and 12 years earlier on a grey November.

I was on a trip back from Finland when the first inklings came. A group of 20 or so teenagers from the town I was living in visiting our twin town in the frozen North. For cost reasons we made the trip from West Germany to northern Finland by train. Leverkusen, Cologne, Hamburg, Copenhagen, Stockholm, Helsinki, Oulu, and back again.

A discarded copy of USA Today at Copenhagen train station while we waited for our connection home - "East Germans flood foreign embassies". Prague and Budapest, that was where they were congregating.

By the time we reached home, momentum was building every day. German TV channels seemed to have turned into rolling news channels when this was a concept previously only known to CNN. My history teacher threw out all mention of a curriculum and wheeled a TV into the classroom. " Das, Kinder, DAS ist Geschichte!"

I confess I had to look up what day of the week that 9th November eventually was. A Thursday, apparently.

Ask my husband, and he'll tell you he was hungover on a sofa in an Israeli Kibbutz when the wall eventually came down. I'm afraid my moment isn't quite as glamorous as it too was a sofa, but just that of my parents, at home in what was still West Germany. Now it's just Germany of course, and the cold war seems to have been replaced by another menace. It's easy to be slightly depressed by mankind's apparent inability to learn from history.

Today, therefore I'm remembering a time when peace seemed possible. Here's to hope.

Herzlichen Glückwunsch, Deutschland.

There's No Place Like Home

It's no secret that I have been lucky enough to travel a reasonable amount, mainly around Europe, but also (with the exception of South America and Australia) briefly touching the other continents.That's not to say that there aren't a great many places I have yet to visit that are on my "to do" list!

I've also been lucky enough to spend extended periods of time living in other countries in my childhood and early adulthood. I'm therefore no stranger to adapting to different cultures, although to be fair they have been mainly Western European!

Whenever I go anywhere, whether for business or for pleasure, I therefore naturally find myself wondering what it would be like to live in the particular country I am visiting. In my head I've lived in the US, done the expat lifestyle in Dubai, lived the good life in France, and even returned mentally to Germany and Finland. Whilst there have never been concrete opportunities, I am sure if at any point I had really wanted to, I could probably have found a chance to push for one of those locations over the past *cough* years.

I do often wonder what has stopped me from taking the plunge. There was always an excuse or other. I guess the truth is that in a two-career household neither of us felt strongly enough about it in order to warrant the inevitable disruption to the other partner's career it would have entailed. Then there are the little excuses that creep in; Dubai is too hot (true, and very valid), the US seemed too far away at the time, France has too many smokers (although the wine may balance that out), Finland is too cold and dark for half the year, I don't think I could cope with the formality of Germany any more etc etc.

When it all comes down to it, this funny little island we live in suits me. Don't get me wrong, I don't think the UK is perfect - far from it by all means. What I am trying to say is that I guess I have finally realised it is kind of perfect for me - probably more by a process of elimination than anything else.

Of course, now that there are children to throw into the equation, and they now both at school, there are different considerations to bear in mind. There's no doubt I'd love to give my children the same experiences I had, and the ease at which they would now earn a foreign language is almost too good an opportunity to pass up. However, I also remember the stress it caused me in my own childhood - the stress of starting a new school in a whole different country when you already have a grasp of the language is reasonable is bad enough... Whilst I know, deep down, that children are adaptable, maybe I'm just not brave enough to take that chance with my own. Finally, from a purely selfish point of view I have friends and family here. I have a support network - not something to be underestimated as a working parent, after all.

It never stops you wondering though, does it...

The Gallery - One Day in August

29th August, 2010 - Glückstadt, Germany - Probably as far away from Bangladesh as you could imagine.

This post is for this week's Gallery.

Mwah!

Source: markfftang on Flickr

I won't bore you with how excited I am to be attending my first ever blogger conference - Cybermummy - tomorrow. I think I've done that enough. However, it has got me thinking about the etiquette of greeting people in Britain - especially those you have never met.

In Germany, it is customary to greet people with a strong handshake. The more Mediterranean cultures go in for kissing - although even this is not necessarily standardised. Even in France it differs by region as to whether the norm is four kisses or two. I am told the Polish compromise with three. Eskimoes rub noses (or is that one of these horrible stereotypical myths?)

What, however, do the British do? Some friends I hug. Others like to go in for air kissing (differing numbers thereof). Some very good friends are not really the kissy type at all and are merely greeted with a cheery "hello".

Trying to remember who likes to do what - for want of a better phrase - can be a bit of a minefield. Invariably it all descends into an awkward shuffle, much blushing and apologies.

Maybe that's the answer. If you meet an English person, just greet them by saying Sorry.

Don't Mention the War

This post was originally drafted earlier in the week, but I didn't quite get around to finishing it. I had considered discarding it, as it is no longer really immediately topical, but in the end decided to go ahead anyway, as I am interested in other people's thoughts on this.

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There was apparently some kind of minor football match on Sunday.

England vs. Germany.

For various reasons we did not actually watch it, although under normal circumstances I would have done. In the end, I don't think I really missed much anyway. It sounds like a 3 hour drive across country listening to an audio CD of "Harry and the Dinosaurs" on a continuous loop was definitely a better way to spend the afternoon.

No matter what the score or the performance of the England team, I never relish these particular games. The so-called "grudge" match. The two enemies. Following the game, the usual comments were made on Twitter reminding people of "Two Wars and One World Cup".

Let's take a step back here. Aforementioned World Cup victory was over 40 years ago. Germany have won the World Cup twice since then (three times in total). They have been runners-up four times in total. I think maybe that trumps one win, and er... no second places. Frankly, crowing about 1966 is an embarrassment in this context (although please don't get me wrong, I am as pleased as anyone that England won the World Cup at least once, even if sadly it hasn't been in my lifetime). However, there's nothing wrong with a bit of friendly sporting rivalry - local teams do it to each other all the time. This isn't my main bone of contention.

What does make me uncomfortable, however, is the references to the Second World War that get trotted out every time the England Germany game takes place. Am I the only one that doesn't consider a war in which millions of people died horrible, gruesome deaths something to really be treated this lightly in association with football? It is, after all - believe it or not - only a game.

I grew up and went to school in Germany, and still have a lot of friends, and even family living there. I like to think I know a little bit more than the average man on the Clapham omnibus about Germany and the Germans. I think the main reaction amongst them to the way the English harp on about the war is a certain sadness. They don't really "get" it. The main reaction from a German is probably incomprehension. It's not because they want to - or can - forget it, however, for them it is not really a joking matter, and I personally feel the same way.

Finally, I think it is fair to say that the vast majority of Germans consider the fact that Hitler was defeated as a good thing. Rubbing in their faces the fact that "they lost" is therefore not actually that effective as taunts go...

Am I being overly sensitive on this subject? Should I just lighten up a bit, as it's no more than a harmless bit of fun?

Or is it time for us to just get over it?

P.S. - I even know some Germans who quite like Fawlty Towers - any excuse to add this one - totally excruciating.