Tuesday, 8 November 2011

Size Matters



I came across the image above on the deepest, darkest depths of the internet recently and it finally jolted me into writing a post that has been floating around the corners of my mind for quite some time.  I have somehow never managed to make the jumbled thoughts in my head on this one into a reasoned post as it’s a horribly emotive subject, so I hope I can manage it this time.

Let me make it clear before I start; I am sure the thought behind the original slogan; “Real Women Have Curves” is admirable, in that it is trying to get women to accept their bodies for what they are, not the stick-thing models they see in magazines. And yet, I will admit that every time I see it, it irks me terribly. You see, I have blogged before about how I am not a fan of labels if they can possibly be avoided, and it strikes me that there is a danger with this thought of simply replacing one unrealistic ideal (women have to be thin) with another one that may be shoehorning women into another defined box (women have to have “curves”).

I’ve thought long and hard about what it actually means for a woman to be curvy, and as with most things, if you trawl the internet for long enough you come across so many different definitions as to be pretty meaningless. One messageboard tells me that “when women describe themselves as "curvy", it's the new code word for "fat"” (charming, I think you’ll agree). The general consensus, however, appears to be that it means women have to be small waisted, large-bottomed, and most importantly, large chested.

Now, there is certainly absolutely nothing wrong with being a perfect hourglass shape. The fact of the matter is that not every woman is that shape, however. It may be true that women's chest and dress sizes have increased over the last 50 years, but that doesn't necessarily mean that everyone suddenly looks like Marilyn Monroe. Look at any high street and you will see a vast array of different shapes and sizes.

I suppose you will think I am lucky when I say that I have been naturally slim-ish all my life (yes, I might even have been called "skinny" at one point or another). That doesn't mean I haven't had plenty of hang-ups about my own body. Take the breast size debate, for example. It's not a huge secret to anyone that knows me that God missed adding some padding "up top" when he created me. Every time I get frustrated by lingerie companies that start sizing their sizing at a B-cup, I try and console myself with the fact I can still shop in the “my first bra” section of M&S if I really wanted to. (Hoorah for choice.) Technically I may have curves in that I am blessed with a small waist and large-ish hips, but I certainly don't recognise myself in the descriptions of curvy that I have seen. Id' like to think it doesn't make me any less real, however!

Photoshopping is commonplace in both fashion magazines and glamour shoots, and the rise of plastic surgery means nobody has to look as nature intended if they don't want to. As a mother to two girls, this saddens me greatly. I would like to think that growing up they will be accepted for how they look, whether that is like Twiggy or like Dawn French, and, most importantly, for them to be happy in their bodies. The last thing I would want is for them to feel the need to look like Katie Price because that is somehow what is now expected!

Saying that Real Women have curves is therefore meaningless and dangerous in my opinion– we might as well say real women are green. Can't we just agree that all women are real women, just like all men are real men, and that is all that matters?


13 comments:

  1. Ra Ra... Bloody well said Missus!!! Hoorah for all shapes!!

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  2. I wholeheartedly agree. I suppose the people saying "real women have curves" are well intentioned, but yes, they forget that some people are thin and normal. You are spot on: all women are real, all images are not. 

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  3. Bloody curves... mine are all in the wrong places! I have no hips but too much stomach! trying to get trousers to fit is a nightmare! It doesn't see to stop Mr.K admiring my shape and for that I'm thankful, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, sexy is a mindset not a dictation.

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  4. I cringe when I hear that "real women have curves" slogan. It usually comes from the mouths of the morbidly obese desperately trying to hide behind the banner of women's rights.

    The fact is, be you male or female, if you are excessively overweight you are likely to dramatically reduce your life expectancy. It's not a feminist issue, it's just a medical fact.

    Having said that, I have to make a stand for the male of the species. Do you really think we are daft enough not to realise that magazines are PhotoShopped? Some of us do like our women to be intelligent and interesting. Given the choice between Katie Price and a small breasted blogger, I know which I'd choose! Perhaps the trick is to make your daughters aware of the fact that not all men mindlessly peruse gormless women with big breasts.

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  5. It is so difficult isn't it? I'm not sure how much comes from me now at the ripe old age of 60. I suppose I should know better but I still feel I should be thinner. I jts seem to be the only one who thinks that! ;)

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  6. It's strange this, isn't it? All these slogans about women and the men pay little or no attention to them. It's the women they're aimed at and they hit their target right in the middle. 

    As Markwrg says, we can often tell when it's been photoshopped or when the boobs are fake. And as much as the old adage of 'it's what's inside that matters' is very very true, it's a pity that men have little trouble accepting this, whereas women do. 

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  7. i believe marilyn was a size 14 when she filmed some like it hot. but that said, i don't think any research has been done as to the dress sizes of jack lemmon and tony curtis. ;o)

    i have to remark though that when photoshopping is done well, you can't detect it. it's only the obviously overdone work that gets people is an uproar. if you're a bad retoucher, you won't be in the business for long. 90% of it is successful and therefore unnoticed. unfortunately, those are the images being presented to us. as Markwrg mentioned, as long as we acknowledge this, we can accept the fact these looks are realistically unobtainable.

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  8. Well said, missus! Maybe the saying should be "real women have lumps, bumps and funny angles"? That might be more accuracte and representative of all? ;)

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  9. I do like to think as you get older you tend to be more relaxed and accepting of how you look (I know I certainly am). You have to feel for these poor 60-something celebrities who feel the need for things like botox etc though... :(

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  10. I guess what also frustrates me is that there is no male equivalent. Why should women have all the debate... I should imagine most men probably realise that they don't look like the adonises with 6-packs they see advertising things like underwear and aftershave. There isn't an equivalent "real men have beer bellies" movement though...

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  11. I agree with you about the photo-shopping. From what I have read, it is so prevalent that there are hardly any images out there that aren't these days. However, as you say, a lot of it is quite subtle and well done (a pimple here, a slimming down there) that is ISN'T noticeable, which in a lot of ways makes it more dangerous.

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